***
Thinking
about a high-tension interview situation: so much depends on the interviewer’s
feedback, both verbal and non-verbal. His/ her body language gives cues as to
whether the candidate is doing well or not. Even one gesture or expression indicating
disappointment or disinterest can just throw the candidate off balance, lower
his confidence, make him forget what he is and knows and the company might lose
a potential sound employee. Or even an approving nod might boost up his
confidence so much that he forgets to be cautious even when he needs to.
Skilled interviewers
are those who have learnt to hide their true opinions of the candidates sitting
in front. However, even an apathetic neutral expression is hard to maintain
constantly and also bad at eliciting true responses.
An interviewer
needs to appear patient, reassuring and ready to truly listen, no matter what
he really thinks of the candidate and what he says. In a way, he needs to
appear just like a counselor who has that ‘Unconditional Positive Regard’
towards the client. They are not assigning positivity or negativity to any part
of the client’s speech or deeds or feelings and thoughts; only listening with a
firm positive regard for him. A big difference is that interviewers have to
judge and counselors don’t. So, even if the interviewer is actually evaluating
you inwardly and laughing at your answers, he would always need to look like a counselor.
I think
of how I would fare if I had to do this and it’s uncomfortable. Simply put, it
is like having a mask on. There’s a term in psychology for that phenomenon when
you feel a particular way about something but do or say the opposite of it for
some reason. It’s ‘Cognitive Dissonance.’ And the ways to deal with this mess
are either to change your inner attitude to match your behaviour or change your
overt behaviour to match your attitude.
You either
start with firm belief that your attitude is right and then it leads to
behaviour consistent with it (The interviewer thinks that the candidate is unworthy
and shows disapproving signs on his face) or you analyze your behaviour and conclude
that your attitude is in fact, different than what you thought and carry on with
the change (Rare to happen but the interviewer tries to appear positive and
reassuring and ends up actually liking the candidate).
The second
one is tricky but useful in manipulating your feelings as well. Like, have you
ever just pretended to like something more than you did and then began loving
it for real? Or have you ever put on a happy mask for the sake of others and
then were carried away so much with acting happy that you actually started
feeling happy from the inside? I think this is why shallow things like food,
entertainment, shopping and even aimless wandering through the city helps lift
our spirits from the darkest of places.
I also think
a lot could be known about a person based on his style of dealing with
dissonance. People who would change their behaviour would be a little stubborn,
confident of their beliefs, not really paying heed to what others might think
of them and clearer in their thoughts than in their behaviour. While people who
would choose to change their attitudes would be flexible, able to manipulate emotions,
concerned with how other people perceive them and less clear in their thoughts
than in their behaviour.
***
